Why do we choose suffering?
Chris McCandliss story touches me
by Neva J. Howell unless otherwise noted
Why do we choose to learn through pain instead of joy?
I just got an email from a friend of mine who has a relative who has been battling cancer for a year or more. The last report was the one every person with cancer dreads….less than a year.
I got this email just as I got back from the doctor with my mom, who has also been suffering for years now, off and on. She has had a couple of heart attacks and has early stages of emphysema and winter is very hard on her. I once again wish I had the money to send her somewhere warm for the winter, where she could bake on the beach and be well.
Even if i could do that though, would it be the right thing for her soul? Would I be taking away her right to create and co-create her reality in the manner that is best for her at a soul level? And who am I to say how much she is suffering anyway? She usually seems more happy than me, despite all the health challenges.
Ah, there’s the rub. If we could always see things from the level of the eternal consciousness that considers pain and death to be mere tools of transformation, we could remain more calm and careful when those we love are suffering in the flesh.
I just watched “Into The Wild” about the young man named Christopher Johnson McCandliss, who spent years traveling toward a destiny he craved…..he ended up starving to death, in terrible pain. It was sometime he had to do. If the movie is true to the facts, and he wrote these words in a book near his time of passing, then Chris McCandliss may have gotten his Truth and completed one of the bravest Vision Quests I’ve ever imagined. He wrote: “Happiness is not real unless it is shared”. Maybe he had to die alone, to really get that at a soul level.
I never saw it more clearly than I do now. This was his vision quest, his time on the mountain alone. And he did it without anyone to bring him down from the hill…in fact, knowing no one could bring him down from the hill. Many people on this planet are going through their own Vision Quests, even as they walk around among us, and we can do the same thing we have done for others in actual Vision Quests; pray, support and honor the work they are doing.
I know there is a purification going on, a sort of global Sweat Lodge and Vision Quest, and many may need to go through the valley of the shadow of all they fear, hate, or resist before it is over.
Let us keep them all in our prayerful witness space, these brave beings who are willing to go through whatever they must to live their life mission. We don’t know what that is, can have no way of knowing.
All we can do is witness and shine the Light that we are toward the Light that they all are, and accept whatever level of healing they choose on the physical while knowing that, on all the levels that really matter, they are healing millennia.