The Silent Treatment

What is the best way to deal with a situation where you know someone is angry or hurt at you but they won’t admit it or say anything about it?
Related: Spiritual Surrender

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Have you ever had a friend or relative snub you and you know they are upset about something but if you ask them, they just say it’s nothing?

And maybe you even know what it is but they won’t admit it?

I’m ponding the spiritually conscious response to this situation this morning. The natural tendency I have is to want to confront the situation, get it out in the open and talk about it but where is that impulse coming from?

If I look at it deeply, I see that it is coming from selfish need. I don’t like the feeling of having something between me and someone I love so I need to have it addressed. This is a decision I’ve made in the past….I’ve pressed the issue until the other person finally spoke out what they were angry or hurt about, or acknowledged that there was an issue.

This morning, I’m not feeling that is the best approach from higher spiritual levels.

First of all, if I’m being motivated by my own need to have something resolved, then I’m not in the right place to fully appreciate whatever is bothering the other person anyway. Second, I am not honoring their right to deal with the situation in whatever way they feel is best.

The problem is that I can see that holding things in is ultimately unhealthy so my second impulse is to want to help. That feels incorrect as well, from higher spiritual levels.

If I pull something out of someone, I have enabled rather than empowered.

It comes to me this morning that the only thing to do is be with the situation, just as it is, without attempting to change it in any way. Acceptance. Surrender.

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