What does life look like if I release everything I believe? Seeing the spiral of suffering and wondering why we are still on it.
Ending the spiral of suffering
Copyright, Neva J. Howell
Saw last night something …. hard to put into words.
It was about the spiral (the spiral of soul evolution) and what life looks like if I completely leave the spiral I’m in, the collective consciousness I’m aware of ….
I have trouble articulating this. I see us all, the human family as spiraling upward in spiritual awakening and awareness. It seems that suffering is part of everyone’s path, at some time or another, but it also seems that a great many of us are on a spiral downward, a spiral of struggle.
I suddenly saw a huge portion of humanity including my entire family line and myself in a spiral, a bend in the evolutionary spiral upward. Like a circular road going uphill, I saw the experiences that are occurring right now as one bend on that evolutionary road.
I understand this particular bend in the road of life quite well. Everywhere I turn, I hear someone talking about how life is a school and we are here to learn. I read about how rich the experiences of suffering can be and how much the soul can glean from the hard times in life. I hear almost every prominent teacher talking about how important it is to find your life purpose or your soul purpose and have a passionate goal to work toward. It’s as if that has replace the spiral upward of more and more joy in experience and less and less suffering.
As I looked at that spiral, standing at the very end of it and with my soul unconsciously reaching toward that next bend in the road, I asked myself what life would look like for me if I went around that bend and up to the next level of being instead of downward again in another spiral of struggle or suffering?
What does life look like if I completely leave the spiral of existence that runs on “life as a school” and “we learn thru the rich experience of suffering” and “you must find your soul purpose” programs? If I move beyond the spiral of suffering and teaching and seeking, what is that next level of living about?
I realized that I truly didn’t know. It was void, and almost paralyzing because I didn’t know what would fill my days if those old programs did not any more. I was so used to life being about learning (meaning struggle and suffering because the spiral had somehow ended up perpetuating was set up to teach through pain). Literally, what would I do with my day?
This morning, I get a glimpse of that reality. If I went to the next level in the spiral of life, it would mean I have decided that others no longer need to show up in my life in states of lack or need. I do not need to have others to help, to have purpose.
If I went round that spiral, it would mean I had decided that I have nothing to learn. I could shift into experiencing and discovery without struggle or mental pain or any specific result in mind – or any mind involved at all.
Maybe the workshops I taught in the past would shift into spaces where those who have spiraled up to the next level could simply connect and enjoy basking in a space of Sacred Joy.
Maybe the healing facilitation sessions I’ve offered in the past would morph into some kind of joyful shared exchange of energy between equally healthy beings. Maybe people would seek out connection with other alchemists just because it is fun to do so and increases the frequency of joy that then bathes the planet.