An outlandish IDEA – Am I reincarnated from the Holocaust?
#holocaustreincarnation #reincarnation #holocaust #symptoms
by Neva J. Howell unless otherwise noted
Holocaust Reincarnation Symptoms
I have had several longstanding pervasive sensitivities and phobias I could never rationally explain. I considered physiological explanations such as a brain tumor as well as mental health imbalances. However, in my core, I knew the answer did not lie in some medical condition. However, ruling that out did little to help for a long, long time.
My weird and unexplained lifelong symptoms:
1. I could not (and still cannot) stand smelling gas fumes of any kind. I don’t mean I just dislike the smell. I mean it feels like death to me. To be in a home with natural gas heat, I felt (and still feel) as if I am suffocating to death. I remember at various times when I was in gas-heated homes, literally willing my lungs to “find the clean air”. It was an imperative. “Find the clean air” were the words that came and I got good at locating the stream of air that was cleaner than the rest, perhaps from a window or crack. Going through tunnels where fumes have accumulated can create the same panic, as can being near a natural gas tank and smelling it.
The Holocaust Tie in: Well, that one isn’t hard to connect. The gas chambers and what must have been an almost constant smell of gas in the air both from the chambers and also, as mentioned later, the semi trucks used to mask the screams.
2. I could not (and still cannot) stand a deep bass engine sound, like the sound a semi truck makes or a generator makes. When I heard it, I felt a little crazy, as if I wanted to just run and as if I were going to die. I remember hearing this deep bass sound a lot when I lived in northeast Alabama and walking all around the property, trying to figure out where it was coming from. I could not sleep, my heart raced all night. It was quite miserable for me. When I got older, I started calling this sound “the vibrations” and it was the bane of my existence for some time. I remember reading about the Taos Hum and wondering if those who were hearing that, when others heard nothing, were really hearing something or if it was flashbacks.
The Holocaust Tie in: I later learned that they used to start up trucks beside the gas chambers, so that people still in the camps would not hear the screams of those being put to death in the gas chambers. That low, rumbling sound of the trucks would have become an indicator of death for those in the camps. The brutal cold in the camps is well known too. In some cases, they actually pumped carbon monoxide into the backs of trucks, killing all inside. The terrible sense of unease that I feel when I hear a prolonged rumbling sound of a big truck, or even smell truck fumes, could have it’s source in these memories.
3. I could not and, with a single exception, still cannot tolerate sleeping with others. I felt trapped, suffocated, in risk of death. This went way beyond simply wanting my own space. I felt as if I were in a situation where there were many bodies on me, not just the one that might have actually been in the bed with me at any given time.
The Holocaust Tie in: When I saw pictures of the holocaust victims in prison camps, crammed together in very tight sleeping quarters with barely room to move, I felt strongly this cellular memory could be part of the reason I feel so unable to stand being in crowded spaces or sleeping in a bed with more than one person. Of course, being piled into rickety beds like that would make it impossible to stay free of lice. This would certainly explain my irrational paranoia about parasites and why that would have heightened when in crowded places.
4. I could not, and to this day cannot, handle cold, at all. I would always feel as if I were dying when in very cold temperature for any length of time. I would feel trapped and I would even pace inside a perfectly warm room, feeling as if I could never escape the cold outside.
The Holocaust Tie in: The prison camps were brutally, brutally cold and the prisoners often did not even have coats or shoes. There was no internal heat and the walls were thin. Many froze to death in the bitter winters.
5. I have long had a phobia of being infested, by lice, or mites or other unseen parasites. This phobia was heightened whenever I was in cold environments or in situations where there were crowds. It doesn’t bother me near as much now but when I was younger, it was this irrational feeling that nothing could ease, that I was “at risk” always of parasites of some kind. It was illogical. I even remember going to a dermatologist who examined me and said I was clear. I still didn’t believe it. I’m glad those days are behind me but when I look back, I don’t know what could explain that degree of paranoia about something that had no basis in current reality.
The Holocaust Tie in: Lice was a pervasive problem in the camps and the remedy for that, whenever it was actually treated, was to dowse the prisoners in toxic pesticide powder. Of course, as soon as they were returned to the camps, the infestation would reoccur because sanitation was so bad. Without knowing how I know, when I read about this something in me knew it. I knew that reality.
6. I had a dream when 12-14 that has never left me. In that dream, my Grandmother was in a concentration camp. I did not know this as a child. I didn’t know what a concentration camp was but looking back, that’s where she was. She was told that she had a choice. She could save her family or she could save the world. If she chose the world, her family would die. If she chose her family, the world would die. This is what she was being told. I woke from that dream drenched in sweat. I think I was about 14 years old. I also had a recurring dream of being in a large pit filled with snakes.
The Holocaust Tie in: When I watched a video showing some of the body pits where they threw dead and dying prisoners, I can’t describe how I felt. The sensation of “find the clean air” came back to me and the dream of being in a pit of snakes. As I considered my Grandmother and her possible lifetime in the camps, I had a new empathy for her hard personality and tough demeanor.
I’m of a metaphysical bent so reincarnation is not a new concept to me. However, I had never considered the idea that I might be reincarnated by a holocaust victim. I don’t remember how I came across information on this but wow, it sure fit. All the most consistent, disturbing and unexplained symptoms I have experienced through my life, as detailed above, could have their basis in having been reincarnated from the holocaust.
Can I prove I am reincarnated from holocaust? No. I don’t remember being there or my name or the location. I don’t really need to prove it to anyone. I cannot explain these bizarre symptoms any other way so far, so why not consider I may have been there. Acting on that potential, I’ve been practicing Hoʻoponopono and also working to retrain my body, mind and emotions to remember that I am not there now. It’s ok to let it go.